6.
I am exhausted. It's a good kind of exhaustion, but still, I need naps. I've been able to juggle my job, drawing, reading, writing, playing video games and watching silly horror flicks. After all, it's October and I need inspiration to keep going after the cold and darkness sets in for good. Winter is coming, right? Last Winter, we had a lot of snow. Our little neighbourhood looked like a cosy postcard people used to send to their families during Christmas. Do people still do that? Things at work have been fine despite the fact that sometimes what I really, really need is silence. I've seen that silence these days can enter the realm of luxuries. Not everyone has access to it, not everyone can enjoy its all encompassing bliss, it's the realm of the privileged.
Silence, silence, silence. I need it so my soul can sing.
Maybe it's the reason why I sleep so little. I enjoy the early hours of the night to stay in absolute silence. During this time I get inspired to write or draw while processing the many thoughts flowing in waves through my head. Sometimes I get desperate! I need to do everything all at once and can't seem to find rest. At least, I don't have neighbours digging their heels on the upper floor, children practising the piano right above my bedroom. Beats all the neighbours I had before, though. These don't make free use of an hi-fi system or play video games at maximum volume during the night. I am very lucky and enjoy their presence even when we don't interact.
Following my last post, I wrote some ramblings in my journal about a somewhat new translation of Teresa's biography. I'd like to transcribe it here, but first I need to understand my own handwriting and second I need to edit a fair amount. So, I think the idea will stay inside the drawer alongside my journal. Writing about Teresa's works and ideas wasn't easy and I assume that when I start seeing what I wrote here, I'll probably bin the whole thing. The gist of the text is translation for authenticity vs. translation as experience. At first, I didn't understand the whole purpose of changing so many things in the original text “for a modern audience”. I also shouldn't fall into traditional bigotry over religious texts. It's exhausting and useless. I just got slightly annoyed because one part of me thinks the original text and respective direct translation (as far as possible) is the right thing to do, whereas the other part felt the new translation is the right way to take it in. Therefore, if you want to read the original text, as written, in all its authenticity and sweet imperfection, all well and good. If you choose instead to read something that is truly transformative, then the new translation is the way to go. Why, though, can't the old one be both? Well, it can. I’ve experienced it both ways and the conclusion I reached is, in order to grasp the old (original) discourse, the one thing we have to put in is work – a lot of it. And it's this work and effort that I miss when I’m reading the new translation. I must be very clear that this translation couldn't be more beautiful and rich – it’s the one I have in physical format – but it just did all the work for me.
In the end, I rambled intensely about this in my journal. I had to cross-reference some sources. I was comparing translations all the while reading about traditions on literature produced by women in the Late Middle Ages. It was over 4am, fortunately on a Friday. My brain was on fire. Then, not on the same day, I wrote about my progress with a book called The Mirror of Simple Souls, written by Margaret Porette. It's not an easy read, but the translation I got, from the University of Notre Dame Press, comes with a f a n t a s t i c introductory essay. Ah, joy! I'll transcribe what I've written here if the inspiration strikes again as I still have to finish the book and read another one about the Latin translation. What drives me to the Mirror is pure curiosity and it's a brilliant piece of spiritual literature from the Middle Ages. The essay focuses on what we know about the life of Margaret before being taken by the Inquisition, as well as theological themes, literary style and tradition, reception, custodial history and translation. A treasure, is what it is.
I finished reading River Kings – The Vikings from Scandinavia to the Silk Roads by Cat Jarman. Wonderful read about the exploits of the Viking Army and viking presence in Central and Eastern Europe, and then further East. I got a deeper look into their society, belief system, military operations, trade, expansion and connection with Constantinople. The book was recommended by someone who knows about my peculiar taste for badass saints and it presented me with a couple of pages about Olga of Kyiv, the scourge of the Drevlians. I wondered if she was the patron saint of widows, and that she is! It was a great way to finish the last chapters at the prow of trade currents possibly reaching Baghdad and further beyond, maybe.
After finishing this month’s Inktober event, I’ll be dedicating more time to Trails from Zero on Nintendo Switch and will hopefully write a few words about it on my blog. There’s a website that runs prompts like Inktober, except it’s year-round. In order to make some effort on that front I could challenge myself to create at least four or five drawings per month, just to train the line and eventually develop my skills. I like to draw on prompt; it’s easier to come up with something almost immediately, without having to waste a long time staring at a blank page. A prompt can either summon something of a creative nature or purely descriptive. I’m satisfied with whatever comes to mind. Time is something I don’t have when I feel that I already have so much going on. And time with silence, lesser still.